Humble – In Every Sense of the Word

Photo Courtesy: Matt Rubel of Rubel Photography

Commentary submitted by Samantha Weed.

College swimming is a beast. There is such a different dichotomy between age group swimming, high school swimming, and college swimming. In high school and age group you can be the best of the best in your area, but as soon as you are recruited to a top-tier swimming school, you are in for a shock. Everyone is as good as you are, or better. All of the sudden you are not only working to improve yourself like you would have in the past, but you are working to prove you are the best on your team. But, the way it works, you can’t be arrogantly the best, you have to be humble. You have to be the superhero that sacrifices your talent for the sake of others. If not, you are seen as a villain. Somewhere we have determined that you have to be humble to be successful.

Wait. What?

Humble?

Ok, so after a quick google of the words “definition of humble” this is what popped up.

1. adj. having or showing a modest or low estimate of one’s own importance.

2. adj. of low social, administrative, or political rank.

3. verb. lower (someone) in dignity or importance.
The etymology of the word (also according to google) shows that it is from the latin word humus meaning “ground” and humilis meaning “low or lowly.”

Humble?

So, according to these definitions I need to be lowly, modest, and feel unimportant. Doesn’t that sound a tad bit self deprecating? When I think of successful athletes/people, the last thing I think of is self deprecation. Most of them are very proud of their accomplishments and don’t think that they are low in importance. They see their worth and know how important they actually are.

I have never heard an interview that went like this…

Reporter: So, you’ve broken the world record by 10 seconds. You must feel so successful right now!

Athlete: Well, you see, it actually wasn’t that great, I just got lucky. Nah, I’m not successful. Again, just lucky.

Most of the time they go something like this…

Reporter: So you’ve won Olympic gold in 4 different sports. How do you feel about it?

Athlete: Thank you! I’m so excited to be a part of history! First, I’d like to thank God for all of my talent and success. Next, I’d like to thank my family and coaches and all of those who got me to this level. I really couldn’t have been this successful if it weren’t for all of those people.

Scenario 2 is the definition of a humble athlete. Why? They aren’t acting very “lowly” or “modest.” They aren’t self deprecating. They are acknowledging their accomplishments! They know they did well! They are humble.

A coach told me once that there is a fine line between being arrogant and humble; you have to watch yourself and find that balance between the two. There is such a fine line, but I never really understood what that fine line was. Believe it or not, there is a name for that line.

At one point while swimming in college I had a mild breakdown. I think it was a combination of me wanting to do well in school and swimming, but also remaining humble in the literal definition of the word humble–or what I perceived humility to mean: lowly and very self deprecating. I wasn’t doing any better because of it. I would read and research over and over again, about humility and everything would tell me to be humble and you will be successful. “The meek shall inherit the earth.” I kept telling myself, I am! I am not bragging, I’m not acting full of myself, I’m not doing anything that could make myself seem better than anyone else! That’s humble! Why am I not progressing?!

It wasn’t until I was forced to go to the team psychologist that I was asked what I thought the definition of humble was. I told him, essentially, not full of yourself. He asked me how I’m displaying these acts of humility in my life. After a few minutes of my blubbering and crying about my frustrations, he told me that I am not being humble. He said, really, the opposite of arrogant isn’t humble.

The opposite of arrogant is self-deprecation and that I haven’t been acting humble. I have been digging myself into a hole. This revelation blew my mind. It made so much sense. I left feeling like I can build a ladder to climb out of this deprecation hole, but I was dumb and never finished asking about what it meant to be humble then. He did instruct me that I can be proud of my accomplishments, I just have to be kind in the process. So, since then I’ve just thought that maybe that’s what it is. Humble is a kind arrogance? That still didn’t feel right.

Now, years later–and coaching top-tier swimmers later, the name for the humility we are all looking for is being grateful. It is keeping all of those things that have made you who you are in mind when you are celebrating your success. It is also constantly looking for that success so you can be thankful.
Being thankful puts things into perspective for people. It helps you remember where you came from. Trying to be thankful is like getting in shape. When you first start working out after a long break, you never see results right away. You don’t really start noticing a difference until it has been a few weeks or even months depending on how out of shape you are and how rigorous you are doing your working out. Eventually, though, you will find success in some way; it just might not be the way you expected.

Be thankful for your successes. I have had a few months where things haven’t been going the way I want them to, and on one particular day, I wrote 10 things that I was thankful for on a sticky note, and my day automatically got better. It was an interesting turn of events. Because I was thankful I took my day back into my own hands instead of in the hands of others, and it went a lot better. I found that I was more successful because I was grateful for the successes I already had, that I didn’t know.

All commentaries are the opinion of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Swimming World Magazine nor its staff.

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Susan L. Lansbury

6 years ago

Elizabeth Beisel

Michael Maloney

6 years ago

Reply to Susan L. Lansbury

and the GREAT Katie Ledecky…