The 29 Confessions of a Distance Swimmer

Photo Courtesy: Brian Jenkins-UVM Athletics

The 29 Confessions of a Distance Swimmer – From the Archives

By Chandler Brandes

“I didn’t choose the distance life. The distance life chose me.”

Well, not quite.

Distance swimmers are all born the same way: we swam the 500 for the first time around age nine or 10 and didn’t do too badly, so our coaches put us in it again at the next meet.

Then again.

And again.

And before we knew it, we were swimming the 1000. Then the dreaded day came when we had to swim the 1650.

And here we are, many years later, still staring at the bottom of the pool, anxiously waiting for the red blocks to appear.

Here are 29 confessions all distance swimmers have:

1. You wish you were a sprinter. Every. Single. Day.

2. You can guess your splits correctly―to the tenth.

Photo Courtesy: Kevin Liles-USA TODAY Sports

3. You have a different pair of goggles you use when racing the 500, which are obviously different than the ones for the 1650.

4. Brackets around sets don’t phase you anymore.

5. You hate when your coach thinks you can swim the 400 IM because you have “endurance.”

6. You secretly have at least one teammate who you will never, ever let count for you.

Photo Courtesy: Brian Jenkins-UVM Athletics

7. You genuinely have no idea what stroke to do when a set says “no freestyle.”

8. You contemplate stopping at least 66 times during the mile.

9. You secretly like training trip because it means long course.

10. You wonder what it would be like to be Katie Ledecky nearly every practice.

11. The thought of all the food you’ll eat after practice is sometimes the only thing that gets you out of bed.

12. Your ideal race plan includes using the first 600 as your warmup.

13. It means so much to you when you see your teammates cheer for you the entire race…

14. …except on the first lap, because no one can be THAT excited with 65 laps to go.

counting_counter_distance_america_east_uvm_vermont

Photo Courtesy: Christa Weaver

15. You seriously consider getting out and slapping your counter each time they shake the numbers.

16. You quietly (or loudly) curse the person who thought it would be a good idea to race anything over a 100.

17. You have separate playlists for the 500, 1000, and 1650.

18. You purposely breathe to the side your coach isn’t standing on.

Photo Courtesy: Taylor Brien

19. You wish there was a 4×500 relay, but then realize how awful that would actually be.

20. You’re thankful that your start has no impact on your races.

21. You often think about all the yardage that you’ve skipped because, even after all these years, you still can’t count correctly.

22. You cry into your goggles almost every practice, but no one notices because your eyes dry long before the set is even halfway done.

Photo Courtesy: Christa Weaver

23. You consider writing complaint letters to broadcast stations for cutting to commercials during distance races.

24. The red blocks are the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen.

25. During long sets, you only have the single most annoying verse of a song stuck in your head.

26. You believe that hearing the bell is the equivalent of angels singing.

Photo Courtesy: Hayley Good

27. You’ve mastered flip turning and pulling down your cap simultaneously.

28. You don’t want to be at the distance session just as much as everyone else doesn’t.

29. You love when people ask in amazement, “You swim all those laps…at once?”

Even though our hearts may be in the 50, we’ll forever be entered in the 1650.

103 Comments

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Mariz Aguirre

6 years ago

Counting the laps you swam…

Christina Sosnowski Lowry

6 years ago

#15 was thought of more than once…

Christina Sosnowski Lowry

6 years ago

#15 was thought of more than once…

Marianne Ward

6 years ago

20 and 21 i SOOOO identify with

Brinson Hubbard

6 years ago

#15 Especially when your counter puts the same number in twice…

Nivaldo

6 years ago

BS…I love to swim 1,500 meters every day of the week and wouldn’t change it for anything…

Secundra Beasley

6 years ago

So true. I am an aspiring distance swimmer and I would never had considered it in my wildest dreams.

Sydney Brault

6 years ago

Regan Nolan my fave distance training partner

Regan Nolan

6 years ago

Reply to Sydney Brault

this is so spot on, couldn’t have made it through w/o you ? what am I going to do next year

Pete Schwenker

6 years ago

#18 is very correct. Until coaches work both sides of the pool.

Tim Johnson

6 years ago

Omg sooo true….and funny….

Luralulu Mlehliw

6 years ago

I like:27. You’ve mastered flip turning and pulling down your cap simultaneously. Lol so true!!!

Julia Huming

6 years ago

Cathleen Pruden ik youve already seen this but damn

Zebron Lemke

6 years ago

Maybe 1 or 2 are true

Zach Burr

6 years ago

23 for sure

Antoine Lambert

6 years ago

Alex Foisy ce sont mes confessions :p

Daniela Gromova

6 years ago

#7 true af

Cassie Jacobs

6 years ago

Seriously though… The one song verse… The entire time

Marko Tanasijevic

6 years ago

Mackenzie Finkbeiner #1 and #18

Mackenzie Finkbeiner

6 years ago

Reply to Marko Tanasijevic

Wow yes, amazing.

Natalie Archer

6 years ago

Brittany Archer

Matteo Zullo

6 years ago

Cricket@bailee

Matteo Zullo

6 years ago

Reply to Matteo Zullo

nvm bailee blocked me on fb

Quike Rosado Lara

6 years ago

Cecilia Langle Pamela Acosta B

Mia Desjarlais

6 years ago

Rosalie Davidson

6 years ago

Reply to Mia Desjarlais

C’est tlm ça en plus?

Mia Desjarlais

6 years ago

Reply to Mia Desjarlais

Oui hahah

Katherine Renaud Miron

6 years ago

Reply to Mia Desjarlais

Cest parfait comme article !

Shruthi Mahalingam

6 years ago

Malavika Vishwanath hahaha??ha.ha.ha????

Malavika Vishwanath

6 years ago

Reply to Shruthi Mahalingam

ALL OF THESE ARE SO ACCURATE OMG

Shruthi Mahalingam

6 years ago

Reply to Shruthi Mahalingam

Number 7 tho?✌

Malavika Vishwanath

6 years ago

Reply to Shruthi Mahalingam

And 12,18,20 and 21 ????

Shruthi Mahalingam

6 years ago

Reply to Shruthi Mahalingam

?????

Jordan Fox

6 years ago

Dean Wilson Jesse Collins ???

Jessica Journeycake

6 years ago

Linda Fox

Nadezhda Baldwin

6 years ago

Masha Baldwin

Andrea Terriault

6 years ago

Marianne Rhéaume Justine Rhéaume

Marianne Rhéaume

6 years ago

Reply to Andrea Terriault

Hahahahaha 10

Sarah McCafferty

6 years ago

Alexandra Morris

6 years ago

Reply to Sarah McCafferty

These are almost all me, I can’t with the accuracy ?

Proteeti Sinha

6 years ago

Pragati Gupta

6 years ago

Reply to Proteeti Sinha

7 and 29 are SO true omg

Matthew Lee

6 years ago

Jonathan Ko

Elizabeth Sloane

6 years ago

Rachael Elkaim Tori Gorman.

Joëlle Tremblay

6 years ago

Justine Laprise ?

Justine Laprise

6 years ago

Reply to Joëlle Tremblay

Ahahah moi ??

Joëlle Tremblay

6 years ago

Reply to Joëlle Tremblay

?❤

Rebecca George Heaton

6 years ago

Cassidy Heaton

Angel Williams

6 years ago

Cody Cole

6 years ago

Reply to Angel Williams

Soooooooo trueeeeeeeeeee

Reham Salah El Din

6 years ago

Rana Ayman

Carly Lynn

6 years ago

Claire Elizabeth

Lilly Etlinger

6 years ago

Eva Gerstle

Joe Frazier

6 years ago

Alex Marie Frazier

Nathan Robinson

6 years ago

Samuel Rutley Jesse Goodyear Boo Waters Charlie Cox Sam Harris Rebekah Sefton

Charlie Cox

6 years ago

Reply to Nathan Robinson

5 ?

Thomas Liess

6 years ago

Cherelle Oestringer so accurate ? Starts perfectly with #1

Cherelle Oestringer

6 years ago

Reply to Thomas Liess

Omg yes??

Annelies Maas

6 years ago

Reply to Thomas Liess

Cherelle Oestringer nr14, 18, 27….

Cherelle Oestringer

6 years ago

Reply to Thomas Liess

Annelies Maas ??

Anne Maree Kermode

6 years ago

Totally agree with no 23

Daniel Velikov

6 years ago

Stoyan

Kelly Ransford

6 years ago

PJ Ransford true?? Sharlene Ransford Mike Ransford

Leander

6 years ago

Thinking about stopping 66 times during the race? Really? I usually don’t start thinking about that into I’m at least 1100 yards into the race and then it’s only a few times, not 66.

As to 23, at least you can watch the entire 1500 at the Olympics on the internet now; NBC usually skipped the entire race.